Archive for Jonathan-isms
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You are browsing the archives of Jonathan-isms.
Jonathan: “OK. I’m the customer and you’re the person who lives here.” (I commented to Bryan that I’m sure some business owners feel that way!) Emma: “OK.” Jonathan: “Hello! I want to buy an animal.” Emma: “Do you want this one?” Jonathan: “Sure.” Emma: “Here.” Jonathan: “Thanks.” “OK, Emma, now you’re my mom. I’m going […]
Overheard as Jonathan and Emma were playing pretend with their baby dolls:
“Dad?” Jonathan says in a high-pitched baby voice.
He responds in his normal voice: “What is it? What is it, Jesus?”
“Can I have this strawberry?”
“No, this strawberry’s for Moses.”
“But Dad–”
“No buts!” he replies sternly. “You can have bread.”
I almost fell out of my chair.
Jonathan’s favorite dessert is Publix (store-brand) ice cream sandwiches. He’d eat one at every meal if he could.
He’s also aware of their physical structure – two soft chocolate wafers with a slab of vanilla ice cream in the middle. And he’s pointed out more than a few times the fact that the wafers have a pattern of small holes in them, like a saltine cracker.
One night after he unwrapped his sandwich and started eating it, he put it down on his plate and started touching the holes with his finger. This is what he said:
“Hey, the ice cream sandwiches have holes in them. Maybe the store gave them to the doctor and the doctor poked them and then the doctor gave them back to the store. Maybe that’s how it happened.”
Thoroughly satisfied with this explanation, he picked up his sandwich and ate it contentedly.
So, Jonathan and Emma got the leftover hamburger buns and tore two or three up into little pieces. I figured this wasn’t cool, but not horrible either. Suddenly I hear, “Oh, God.”
Shocked, I asked Jonathan, “What did you say?”
“Just the sacrament.”
Well, at least he wasn’t swearing. :)
Just to set up this first conversation: we are trying to encourage potty training right now by offering “rewards.” Jonathan gets some Smarties for using the toilet (he even gets a single candy for just sitting on it) and can even earn a prize–currently Magic School Bus books. Emma gets two M&Ms. We tried having […]
Scene: Jonathan running around the room in a circle Jonathan: “Look Daddy, I’m making a circle. Like a cinnamon roll.” Scene: While I’m tying Jonathan’s shoelaces, he reaches over and starts untying mine. Me: What are you doing? (Not in a very patient tone — it had been a long day) Jonathan: “Untying your […]